Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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