Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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