I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
me + whiskey = a bad person
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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