Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
After tacos, we're chasing women.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Randomize
