drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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