Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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