Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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