i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
