I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize
