I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
