i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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