i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
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