why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Randomize
