Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize
