16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
