I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize