he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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