I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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