I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
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