Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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