Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
