my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
