Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
That's intense
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
