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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
