Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
