I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
