I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
