What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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