I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
