Fuck appropriateness.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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