Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
