i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Randomize
