Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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