I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
