we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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