Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
