you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
