**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
