I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Randomize
