Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Randomize
