Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
