he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Your topless pictures make me question reality
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
