Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
