I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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