That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
i need to put some appletini on your dick
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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