At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Randomize
