Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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