And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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