p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize