I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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